الإدمان

غريبةٌ هي الحياة، حقيرٌ هو الزمن
ينتظر الواحد منّا دهراً من أجل فرصة أخرى
و يمر الزمن لا بل يدور الزمن، فهو ليس مستقيماً كما يبدو، و لكنّه حلقيٌ بامتياز
و يطول الانتظار و تتفاوت بالطول شعلة الأمل، تخبو احياناً و تتقد أُخرى
و يتسرب العجز و الاكتئاب و الرتابة و تتلون الحياة بمشتقات الرمادي و يستمر الانتظار
فقط عندما يمّل الانتظار منّا تأتي الفرصة
و لوهلة يصبح للحياة معنى
و لوهلة يفقد الماضي سواده و يطغى الأزرق على الألوان
و لوهلة ننسى العُمر الذي مضى و الحقائب التي حُمِّلناها
نفرح بها كفرح الأطفال بلعبة
و لوهلة ننسى أننا كبرنا و هرمنا، و أننا فقدنا الجرأة لعناق ألعابنا و الفرصة
فقط عندما نُدمن الانتظار تأتي الفرصة
محظوظٌ من يتجرأ على اغتنامها فيحترق بلهيبها و لو للحظة
لأنّه في تلك اللحظة قد ينكشف الوعي و يُصبح لكل شَيْءٍ معنى
ولأنّه في تلك اللحظة فقط قد تبدأ رحلة اللاعودة

Advertisements

العشق

 ثانية واحدة فقط جعلته ينسى كل الحياة التي مضت وكل الايام التي انقضت

لسنوات عديدة كان يقف على حافة المنحدر و يتردد في القفز إلى أعماق الوادي

لسنوات عديدة كان يقف على مسافة آمنة من العاصفة و يتساءل عن شعور من كان في عينها

لسنوات عديدة كان يقف بالقرب من النار و يكتفي بتأملها و الإعجاب بقوتها

لسنوات عديدة كان يرغب باكتشاف نفسه و الحديث معها و لكنه يخشاها

ثانية واحدة فقط قلبت كل الأوراق، غيرت كل الحقائق، و كشفت له مستويات آخرى من الوعي

ثانية واحدة فقط التقاها فيها، قابل عينيها و بدأ رحلة عشقها

ثانية واحدة فقط قرر بعدها أن يعيش

The echo

 

 

In that field, he regularly stood as a boy and shouted. The field was paved with tall green and brown grass. It resembled a savanna that was disrupted by islands of plants and a maze of roads carved by the feet of farmers and the occasional travelers. It was surrounded by hills and green mountains. On his side of the field stood a modest white mosque on the edge of a graveyard that hosted his ancestors, while on the opposite side stood a gigantic villa of a young and lunatic, cigarette and hashish smuggler. On his side of the field the plants had bulkier roots, while on the other side the plants were greener.

In that field, he regularly stood and shouted. Just before the end of his screams, the echo of his voice, on every single occasions, pierced the air and became clearer and clearer. In the few seconds that followed, he always enjoyed the feeling of being the master of the land!

Many years later, he regularly hears the same echo although he stopped shouting. It visits him mostly while drifting to sleep but on occasions it is clearer at early mornings. It becomes louder as the events of life intensify. It becomes closer to yelling as he tries to embark on new adventures or as he faces life pleasures or tragedies. The screams fade away as his memory drifts back to his side of the field. In the few seconds that follow, the once master of the land fights hard to continue being the master of his life.

  • The pics are for his side of the field.. The other side can barely be seen!!

Regret

imageThe water well was in the centre of the courtyard of his grandparents’ village house. It was near the grape trees and not so far from the mulberry trees. It was well preserved but rarely used. Its walls were colored white with shades of decaying grey. Its mouth was covered with a thick scrappy metal sheet that was fixed down by the weight of randomly distributed stones.

The water well was the centre of many stories about ghosts, walking skeletons, snakes and mysterious creatures. They all lived inside it and were ready to eat any child that dared to uncover it.  Even worse, they were ready to kidnap any child and hide him away from his parents inside a maze of murky water caves.

Still, the well was so luring; he remembers clearly uncovering it on number of occasions, he actually remembers daring to look down to see the clear but black and far layer of water. He also recalls sessions of throwing small and large stones into it and hearing them as they slapped the deep water. Screaming sounds always followed these sessions. On each occasion, he expected to finally see the creatures that lived deep down the well. But, for a strange reason, these sounds always turned out to be those of angry parents or relatives promising gruesome punishment.

Thirty years later, he believes that these stories were most probably told to frighten the kids, block their inquisitive minds and protect them from falling inside the well.

However, somehow he still regrets that he never went down the well to unravel its mysteries. An opportunity missed; that forbidden path is now abandoned and closed forever!

Courage

The smallest river could appear as wide as the earth if one is not courageous enough to cross it!

This leads to the necessity to define courage:

It is a vague word that derives from a mixture of carefulness or carelessness, wisdom or ignorance, love and hate, greed and generosity, and many other feelings…. Only when the balance is right the widest of rivers can be easily crossed!

حديث أصدقاء

يحكى ان هذا اللقاء حصل في زمن ليس بيعيد و في قهوة قريبة بين صديقين

هو: مرحبا يا حبيب

صديقه: وعليكم السلام و رحمة الله، زمان ما اجتمعنا! كيف الشغل؟

..هو: متحمساً للغاية للحديث عن رحلته الروحية: كنت مسافرا في مهمة عمل لعدة ايام في جدة

صديقه: صحيح، قلتلي قبل ما تروح. كيف كانت السفرة؟

…هو: كانت جيدة بس الأهم أَنِّي أخيراً اعتمرت و كان شعوري

صديقه: مقاطعاً وجدياً، هل تعلم أنه من علامات آخر الزمان أن تُزار مكة بغرض السياحة؟

..!!هو: بعد صمت قصير و رغبة ملحة في سؤال صديقه عن قصده و ربما شتمه، استطاع أن يقول كلمة واحدة فقط: معقول

 صديقه: نعم الحديث صحيح

هو: شكراًعلى المعلومة، قلتلي كيف الشغل؟

يُحكى أيضاً أن (هو) لا يذكر إذا كان قد شرب القهوة ام الشاي ذلك اليوم و أنه شعر بالآسف من التطرّف الذي آل إليه صديقه و لكن ببعض الفرح أنه ربما استعمله الله كعلامة لنهاية العالم

اما (صديقه) فيذكر مرارة القهوة و يلعن الزمن الذي صار فيه الهراطقة يزورون الحرم و لا يكتفون بالرقص و اللهو و الفلسفة

Ageing!

Finally he phoned her.  He waited longtime for a right moment. But it never came so he phoned her. He wanted to reconnect with his old self. She sounded happy, elated and different. He heard her asking

“Are you ok? Why did you phone?”

“Ok” He replied with a voice that carried million years of waiting.

A very short random discussion followed; a question about kids and another about weather.  Of everything he wanted to say, he managed only two boring words: “Keep Well” then she hung up.

He went on to face life as usual. Deep down, he believed that time has changed her.

Deep down, he trusted that she was gone forever.

…………………………………………………

Many years ago she elected to wait for his return.  She prepared herself for every possibility and waited. On that day, he sounded older, tired and different.

“Are you ok? Why did you phone?” She barely managed to ask with a voice that carried million years of anticipation

“Ok” He replied

A very short random discussion followed; a question about kids and another about weather.  Of everything she wanted to hear, he said two-boring words: “Keep Well” then he hung up.

She went on to face life as usual. Deep down, she believed that time has changed him.

Deep down, she trusted that he was gone forever.

…………………………………………………………………….